Saturday, December 15, 2007

You are fired!

Well, I did what I thought was right.

I stood up for integrity.

I got fired for it.

I refuse to regret it.

God is using it to draw me nearer to Him. I trust Him.

We have been praying (begging may be a better word for it)... for another way. I have been unhappy in my job. I have been missing my children and feeling the need to be with them more. I think this is an answer to our prayers.

Bad timing (single mom, three kids, a week before Christmas). Definitely hurt my pride (I've never been fired before!). I was quite shocked at the way it all happened (I didn't do anything wrong. He even told me that I'll have no problem finding another job, since I'm such a great employee!?!?).

Wow. That is all I had to say. Wow.

Please pray for us as we seek God for His new way for us. I hope and pray for a way of financial provision where I can be home more for my children....

Be careful not to get caught up in the whole holiday busyness. People are more important than wrapping paper, decorations, cookies, laundry, dishes, traveling, arranging schedules...etc, etc... Don't miss the joy and the gift of our Savior Jesus during this time. I know I'm sure looking for Him in every moment today!!

Wednesday, December 05, 2007

The truth

I’m so sad about the person that I’ve become. I used to be sold-out for Jesus. Nobody could affect my attitude, because I was in love!! Everything that I did was for Him.

What happened? Why am I struggling so much to get that attitude back? I am harboring bitterness in my heart because of my silly circumstances. I am falling for the lie that since I can’t be a stay at home mom anymore that I’ve lost my purpose and can’t be what God wants of me. I am allowing Satan to have a stronghold on me, which I despise. I am letting life run me, instead of letting God run my life. Before, God had me in His Hands. Now, I feel like so much is up to me. I feel the burden of responsibility on my shoulders and can’t figure out how to let it go.

Most of the time, I feel like I am doing fine…surviving, you know? And then I read an e-mail or someone sends a card and I fall apart. It reminds me of how far away I am from God right now. So many times I say that I miss my old life. But friends remind me of how difficult that time really was with my husband. I realize now that I miss my old self and that relationship I had with Him.

Okay, I guess I needed to unload. I’m sorry. But needless to say, please pray for me. I miss my Lord…

Monday, December 03, 2007

A favorite saying

Heard today from one of my children...

"Mom, today was a really great day!! Well.....except for the parts that you weren't there."

Bless his heart! I love him so much!!